How to Welcome the Dechurched Without Reinforcing the Reasons They Left
In Part One, we explored who the dechurched are, why they are not the same as the unchurched, and what it will take to rebuild trust with those who have walked away from church—not because they stopped believing, but because they stopped belonging. The goal is not just to get the dechurched back in the building. It is to help them re-encounter Jesus and rediscover a church that feels like home again—one shaped by grace, truth, accountability, and authenticity.
But that will not happen through marketing campaigns, hospitality teams, or catchy sermon series alone. The dechurched have been to church. They know what the surface looks like. What they are watching for is whether anything underneath has truly changed.
Here are five ways churches can begin welcoming the dechurched in a way that honors their experience and restores their trust:
1. Be Honest About the Past
When people walk into your church carrying church hurt or disappointment, silence does not heal them. Minimizing their pain or rushing to fix it only confirms their fears. One of the most powerful things a church can do is acknowledge that the church has sometimes failed.
That might mean owning a history of exclusion, poor leadership, or unchecked power. It might mean being honest about mistakes your church made years ago. Owning the past builds credibility in the present. And it tells the dechurched that they are not crazy for walking away—that their pain is real, and they are not alone.
2. Prioritize Integrity Over Image
The dechurched are not impressed by polish. They are looking for substance. That means being less concerned with appearing healthy and more concerned with being healthy. Flashy graphics and trendy language do not matter if the systems behind them are still broken.
Create space for people to ask hard questions. Lead with humility. Make sure your leadership model includes accountability and shared responsibility. Let people see that you are doing the internal work, not just trying to clean up the outside.
3. Build a Culture of Listening
Many people left church because they felt unheard. Others stayed quiet for years and finally walked away when no one noticed. If you want to reach the dechurched, you need to become a church that listens.
That means more than collecting surveys. It means creating environments—small groups, one-on-one conversations, intentional forums—where people can share their stories without fear of being corrected or dismissed. Listening does not mean you agree with everything you hear. It means you care enough to let someone finish the sentence.
4. Let Grace Be Tangible
We say we believe in grace. But too often, church still feels like a performance. If the dechurched are going to come back and stay, they need to see grace lived out in relationships, not just preached from the stage.
Welcome people who are messy. Be patient with questions that do not get answered right away. Offer rest without strings. Let them breathe before you expect them to serve. Let them heal before you push them to plug in. Grace cannot just be an idea—it has to shape your pace, your expectations, and your posture.
5. Focus on Formation, Not Just Attendance
The dechurched are not coming back for church-as-usual. They are looking for something deeper—something that helps them grow, wrestle, and rebuild. If your goal is just to get people in the room, they will leave as quickly as they came. But if your goal is to help people be formed into the image of Christ, they may find what they did not know they still needed.
Make spiritual formation central. Teach people how to walk with Jesus, not just sit through a service. Let them rediscover faith one step at a time. Show them that the church is not just an event—it is a people becoming more like Christ, together.
Reaching the dechurched is not about lowering the bar. It is about raising our awareness. It is about welcoming people with open arms and open eyes—people who have been burned, bored, or broken, but who might still be open to hope if we give them a reason to trust again.