How to Create a Culture of Listening in Your Church
In Part One, we explored why listening might be the most overlooked leadership skill in the church. It builds trust, reveals deeper issues, and reflects the heart of Jesus. But listening can’t stop with the pastor. If we want to see long-term health, we need to build a church where listening is part of the culture.
Not just a leadership trait.
Not just something we do in crisis.
But something that shapes the way we relate to each other, make decisions, and walk together in faith.
Here are five ways to begin creating that kind of culture:
1. Start with the Leadership Table
If listening isn’t modeled by leaders, it won’t take root in the church. Create space in your meetings not just for planning, but for listening. Before you talk strategy, ask how people are doing. Let every voice around the table matter, not just the loudest or most experienced.
Invite honest feedback. Ask open-ended questions. Be willing to hear hard things without rushing to fix them. The posture you model at the leadership level will set the tone for everyone else.
2. Train Your Team to Ask Better Questions
Listening well starts with asking well. Instead of “How’s it going?” try:
“What’s been hard lately?”
“Where have you seen God at work?”
“What do you wish more people understood right now?”
These kinds of questions invite honesty and vulnerability. They help people reflect, not just report. Over time, they create a deeper level of conversation—one where people feel safe sharing what they’re really carrying.
3. Slow Down the Decision-Making Process
It’s hard to develop strategy for people you haven’t listened to.
When churches jump straight to planning without taking time to hear their people and their communities, we often end up solving the wrong problems. We assume needs, then get frustrated when our solutions don’t land. Not because we failed to execute, but because we didn’t start with real input.
Listening should be the first step in any ministry strategy. Whether you're launching a new initiative or changing an existing one, create intentional space to listen. Hold listening sessions. Ask members what they’re feeling. Ask your community what they’re missing. Build planning rhythms that start with people, not just ideas.
It doesn’t mean every voice drives the direction. But every voice should be invited to the table. Strategy shaped by real stories is far more likely to bear fruit.
4. Honor the People Who Speak Up
In many churches, people are quiet because they’ve learned that speaking up doesn’t matter. If we want to reverse that, we need to celebrate those who take the risk to share their thoughts—especially when they speak with humility and love.
Publicly thank people for offering insight, not just agreement. Let the church see that disagreement isn’t dangerous, and that honest input helps us grow. When people see that their voice matters, they’re more likely to use it.
5. Make Listening a Discipleship Issue
At its core, listening is not just relational—it’s spiritual. James wrote, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” That’s not just good advice for leadership. It’s a picture of maturity.
What if part of being a disciple of Jesus meant learning to listen like Him?
What if our churches became known not just for what we preach, but for how well we hear?
Listening won’t fix everything. But it will build something.
It creates a foundation of trust, a culture of respect, and a path forward when things are hard.
It also gives us the clarity we need to make wise decisions.
Before we lead with plans, we need to lead with presence.
Before we respond with programs, we need to respond with listening.
That is how churches grow—not just in size, but in health.